bX bio

Hello and welcome to the nonlinear world of GaianXaos. I'd like to thank you for participating in this very special web experiment. The goal of this experiment is simply to explore new dimensions of consciousness, and to find ways in which the experience of these dimensions can be communicated. The information is primarily based on my own experiences of nature, reality, consciousness, dreams, and spirituality.

I've completed my Masters degree in Complex Systems Science at the University of Pavia, Italy.  Also, my Bachelor's degree is in Computational Mathematics from the University of California at Santa Cruz. My focus in the field of mathematics has been the study of Complex Dynamical Systems Theory, commonly known as Chaos Theory. My favorite activities are dancing, hiking in the woods, sailing, mixing electronic music, and making love to the universe. I hope that this site will prove to be a valuable online resource for anyone interested in exploring this material.



My primary passion in life is the exploration of chaos, and the application of complex dynamical systems theory to nature and consciousness. Throughout my spiritual quest into the mysteries of creativity and hyperspace, chaos has continuously proven to be my greatest ally. When I was nineteen, I decided to pursue a life’s work in chaos and complexity theory. This decision coincided with my discovery of new holistic approaches to the life sciences, especially with regard to Sheldrake’s theory of formative causation, Lovelock’s gaian hypothesis, and Mae Wan Hoe’s crystalline matrix. In my studies of the evolution of consciousness throughout human civilization, I began to realize that the traditional compartmentalized fields of human knowledge were now converging toward a broader understanding of whole systems and complex dynamics.

Our entire civilization, from around 4000 BC to present, has been strongly characterized by man’s quest for absolute power through the suppression and linearization of nature. Now, the scientific breakthroughs of the 21 st century are leading toward a completely new understanding of nature, which appreciates that the entire universe, including consciousness, is a complex dynamical nonlinear phenomenon.

Nature is the highest form of technology. During my college years, at least seventy percent of my education was attained outside of classes, usually deep in the woods which surrounded my campus. My work in school became a tool for integrating my own direct experiences of reality. Into the dark belly of the earth, my adventuring friends and I would travel elusive trails, get completely lost, and slip quietly beyond the programmed cultural boundaries of fear, separation, egotism, and linearity. Only a couple of miles from the nearest highway, we had penetrated into a vast alien world where corners and straight lines ceased to exist.

During my forest adventures, one of the first things I realized is that every thing in nature is the manifestation of a conscious living being. I was amazed that this includes not only animals and plants, but rocks, water, and stars as well. Also, I experienced curious ways in which doorways of communication between my self and this living spirit could be established. The frequency and range of my communication with the sprit of nature seemed directly related to my awareness of the connectivity between various manifestations in nature. As I explored this doorway of communication, I began to perceive the various aspects of nature as infinitely interconnected fields of energy. By virtue of such connections, any individual manifestation could be seen arising from a singular underlying wholeness of being. Everything was flowing as one movement.

As these internal visions are occurring, it is incredibly difficult to remember the whole implication of their deeper meaning. These subtle levels of consciousness shed linguistic definition like water off a duck’s back. Similarly, when I wake from a vivid dream, the vision submerges into forgetfulness as quickly as I try to hold on and definite it. Such experiences challenged me to stretch my language in attempts to describe these subtle and elusive thought-formations.

This is when I rediscovered Chaos Theory. When I began at UCSC, I was inundated with amazing new forms of information, especially via the internet. While I was trying to build my own language to integrate new experiences, I quickly discovered the trialogues of Rupert Sheldrake, Terence McKenna, and Ralph Abraham. I was amazed to find them discussing concepts which where totally new to me, but at the same time, I felt a deep intuitive understanding of what they were driving at. In the struggle to integrate my internal visions, concepts such as the gaian mind, hyperspace, attractors, fractals, bifurcations and resonance were of tremendous aid.

In the winter of 1999, as I independently stepped up my study of chaos and nature, I was surprised to find out that Ralph Abraham was going to teach an Intro to Chaos Theory course at UCSC. As a freshman, much of the material presented in this course was completely beyond my immediate ability to grasp. However, this course established the foundation of almost all of my future work in the University. The desire to integrate my subtle experiences of nature led me to focus on possible models for communication within a higher dimensional context. My final project for Ralph’s course, entitled The Fundamentals of Being, explored the concepts of perception, memory, and language in terms of hyperspace, chaos, group perception, and morphic fields.

The revolutionary ideas of Rupert Sheldrake have given me a completely new perspective on reality. The more I studied his work, the more I was convinced that he was on the right track. In my internal vision of the wholeness of all things, I could see and experience what Sheldrake was talking about. Reductionism, as a cultural addiction, severely blocked any type of real understanding of nature. Once nature is considered as a whole, it becomes strikingly evident that it is alive. From a holistic perspective, it is also apparent that the behavior of nature is anything but static and linear. Combining Sheldrake’s insights into biology and consciousness with the new mathematics of Abraham’s chaos theory provided a new, powerful, conceptual framework for exploring the complex hyperdimensional dynamics of reality.

I enthusiastically took my rough ideas to my college adviser with the hope of creating my own major somewhere along the lines of chaos, consciousness, and everything. It made sense to me that the numerous subjects and departments within the University were really all looking at the same thing, but from various perspectives. As I tried to apply knowledge from school to the real world, the connections between Math, Physics, Biology, Psychology, Art, Ecology, and Sociology were too obvious to ignore. Unfortunately, my advisor told me that “I had to be more specific.” In the current educational paradigm, interdisciplinary studies are only tolerated to a limited degree.

Despite the bureaucracy’s reluctance to approach the world holistically, I continued my own personal work of building holistic models of nature. I discovered that the study of chaos is actually a branch of Mathematics known as dynamical systems theory. Having a pretty solid background in math, I choose to continue with math as my major. I was greatly inspired by the legends of the Chaos Cabal, a group of graduate students at UCSC who, in the late 70’s, had developed an applied approach to chaos known as Experimental Mathematics. This approach has since evolved into the related fields of Computational Math, Numerical Methods, and Nonlinear Analysis. With this as my general direction, I began dreaming of ways to use mathematical models of chaos to further our understanding of natural systems including consciousness.

Again and again, my experience allowed me to see that although various aspects of nature appeared separate, they were in fact extensions of a deeper holistic level of reality. I continued to try to incorporate my ideas about holistic science and chaos into the work I did for general education and elective courses. My favorites included ‘Philosophy of Mind’, ‘Psychobiology’, and ‘Humanistic Psychology’.

I also took courses such as ‘Krsna & the Arts’ and ‘Presence of Shiva’. The papers I’ve produced in this context focused on the building of models, which humans could use to relate to the infinite spirit. As I engaged reality, I discovered that the habit of clinging desperately to one’s ego could be reversed to reveal a deeper level of divine consciousness. Could this vast ocean of awareness be our collective mind, or perhaps even the mind of all beings?

My attempts to find some convergence between the theories of mathematics, nature, and consciousness quickly led me into the study of Biology and Physics, both of which share a common desire to understand the manifestations of nature. I was amazed by the myriads of organizational levels within the biosphere ranging from interglacial cycles and ecosystem webs to neurotransmitters and DNA. For me, the most prominent features in the biosphere were that there is no actual separation between various levels of scale, and that all patterns in nature exhibit complex fractal geometry. If Sheldrake is right, then the behavior of nature is not determined by a set of laws, but is continuously evolving according to the tendencies of habit and creativity.

What are the rules of nature, and how are they evolving? This seemed like a good area of research. On my own time, I began studying physics with regard to Einstein’s general relativity and quantum theories. I was able to apply my investigations by taking courses such as ‘Cosmology & Culture’ and ‘The Quantum Century.’ My individual work in the first class mentioned above focused on the concepts of holograms and non-locality as a means to explore the underlying reality of unbounded wholeness, which somehow reflects itself to create the entire landscape of relational realities.

For the second class, I embarked on a deep investigation into the history and mathematical conceptualizations of the various quantum theories. In the final paper, Dynamics of Morphing Psy-Trance-Formations, the connection was made that a quantum wave in Hilbert space is basically a representation of a morphing field of possibilities. In a quantum experiment, the dynamic evolution of these fields depends on the observer’s choice of reference frame in the present moment. I attempted to expand the existing theory to account for all possible reference frames, and I achieved a crude mathematical formulization of the Universal psi-wave . Quantum theory, I discovered, is actually a mathematical description of a fundamentally deeper level of reality, which precedes and organizes the manifestations of physical existence according to the dynamics of hyperdimensional fields of possibility. These morphing fields are responsible for generating, not only quarks, but organisms, societies, star systems, and ideas as well.

Although my work was more based in theory than an actual applied method for dealing with physical research, the perspective I gained in this period allowed me to open many new exhilarating doorways into the greater reality. For example, I found a delicious blend of math, holism, and consciousness when I began studying the Mayan calendar systems and the ideas behind their mysterious forgotten culture. In a lengthy investigation, entitled Galactic Mayan Time-Science Project on Earth, I delved into how the Maya’s unique mathematical system was used, and how they were able to synchronize with natural time by tapping into the consciousness of the greater galactic whole.

The basis of the Classic Mayan philosophy was formed by an advanced understanding of energy/mass/time/space/light, and of complex dynamical systems theory. The Mayan numbers and glyphs are codes for the possibility fields, which proceed and generate the manifestations of reality. I was amazed that the Tzolkin, which forms the centerpiece of their calendar system, and consists of a matrix of 13 numbers and 20 glyphs, could be used to map complex fields of possibility from the scale of days, to centuries, to cycles of civilizational advances, and to cycles of the Earth’s precession.

The Classic Mayan system could be viewed as an advanced model for a civilization founded on the holistic dynamics of nature. Our current modern industrial paradigm appears to be actively pursuing the exclusion of nature altogether, and at grave risk to our continued existence. By resonating with the cycles of natural time, one’s frequency harmonizes with the whole of existence, unlocking doorways into the vast subconscious mind of the cosmos.

My own temporal awareness follows the succession of full moons, which I traditionally celebrate by gathering with friends in nature, and dancing all night to psychedelic music. Phenomenal things occur when large groups of openhearted people begin synchronizing with nature through ecstatic dance/trance/ritual ceremonies. The moon tribe gatherings in the mountains of Santa Cruz were an integral aspect of my conscious re-evolution.

I am also continuously experimenting with audio/video synthesis technology and how it can be used as a tool for exploring the dynamics of collective perception. Mostly, I just really love music and dancing because they allow me to find my way to the present moment. Once the present moment is accessed, it is possible to sustain the connection with the now, and to ride a wave on this edge of eternity, like a flowing trajectory in some infinite dimensional nonlinear vector field. For some reason, really good electronic music and visual art always take me directly into these types of experiences.

Aside from inspiring me to use super computers to generate psychedelic art forms, my mystical dance experiences led me into the practice of Tai Chi Chuan. I was able to study Tai Chi for two years at UCSC, and I’ve continued diligently in the four years since my graduation. My instructor, Courtney Blackburn, has been a tremendous influence in my life. Through my practice, I’ve learned amazing things about reality, consciousness, health, and conflict resolution. I strongly believe that a broader awareness of chi flow and polarity is essential for interacting within hyperdimensional landscapes of time-space

My ongoing quest into chaos and complexity throughout college culminated in my final senior seminar project. This project, entitled Infinite Dimensional Chaos in the Broadest Sense, represents a survey of the conceptual landscape within dynamical systems theory and bifurcation theory. As in my other projects, the material is presented in a way that is hopefully easy to access for the novice as well as stimulating for the professional.

The main thesis of this paper is that complex behavior can be explored best through the use of qualitative models, which exploit computer graphics, as opposed analytical methods, which rely on symbolic manipulation. This paper elucidates why it is usually impossible to use analytical methods to solve dynamical systems which are nonlinear and of high dimension. The stated goal of this project is to build advanced geometric models, which can be used to further our understanding of natural systems.

This project explores dynamic models by building upon increasing levels of abstraction, starting from a generic physical phenomena, to the phase portrait, to the super dynamic representation, and then to the dynamic scheme representation. The context is then broadened further by introducing Rene Thom’s big picture, in which a dynamical system is represented as a single point in new type of superspace. By varying the function which defines a system’s dynamic behavior, for instance by modulating a control parameter, a trajectory is traced in this new superspace. Bifurcation, and thus unstable behavior, occurs when the trajectory in superspace intersects which the set of hyper-surfaces, often fractal surfaces, known as the bad set. This idea was generalized further to illustrate a model for any natural system for which the rule that governs the dynamics is continuously evolving.

Subconsciously, I was being attracted toward a deeper mathematical foundation for Sheldrake’s theory of morphic fields. I realized that by incorporating my previous work in quantum theory with my new understanding of superspace dynamics I could explore the nonlinear dynamics of continuously morphing fields of quantum possibility. For instance, the probabilistic evolving dynamic fields of the many individual species on Earth could be seen as particular solutions to an overarching probabilistic evolving dynamic field of the entire biosphere. This same principle could easily be extended to the context of a vast number of evolving solar systems within an evolving galactic system. The following is an excerpt, which attempts to elucidate the underlying thesis of this report.

“The basic idea is that the evolution of natural systems can be represented qualitatively in terms of morphing fields of probabilistic tendencies. If we apply the concepts which were developed in the previous sections, it becomes theoretically possible that the dynamic rule which generates these evolving probabilistic systems may itself be evolving probabilistically. It is now also theoretically possible to consider the likelihood that these infinite levels of nested probabilistic systems are integral aspects of one infinite dimensional superspace system. This abstract system, which we have been conveniently referring to as Ωt, represents the universal superdynamic system which is responsible for the generation and evolution of all possible dynamic systems which occur in nature, not excluding the minds of seriously disturbed mathematicians such as myself.”

Since my graduation, I’ve spent an incredible amount of time researching current geopolitical events and their historical roots. Originally, I began investigating the suspicious events surrounding September 11 and the so-called war on terrorism. This line of research quickly evolved into a broader study of our system of global capitalism, and of our industrial dependence on nonrenewable hydrocarbon resources.

According so a growing community of geological experts, including Colin Campbell and Richard Heinberg, we are currently experiencing the global peak of oil production. The human species, it turns out, will never exhaust the Earth’s supply of oil. However, beyond the global peak, it actually requires more energy investment to get the oil than one obtains from converting the oil back into usable energy, and thus, global production of oil will begin an irreversible decline effective immediately. Many, individuals would disagree with the above thesis; however, the empirical evidence to support this claim is strong enough to at least warrant serious open- minded investigation. In my opinion, the occurrence of peak oil presents the greatest evolutionary challenge the human species has ever faced. The actual year in which oil production peaks may vary depending on global circumstances; however, the peak will definitely occur within our lifetime, most likely before 2010. The implications are staggering to say the least.

However, the politics of oil, war, and capitalism cannot be studied in a vacuum. In order to wrap one’s mind around the implications of peak oil, it is necessary to approach the world holistically in terms of deep ecology, systems theory, and nonlinear dynamics. In other words, it becomes necessary to view human civilization as a complex system, which is embedded within the larger biosphere. Perhaps renewable channels of natural energy, which could usher in a new post-carbon civilization, are waiting to be accessed through chaos and holistic science.

Currently, I’m working on expanding my understanding of dynamical systems theory into the realm of artificial neural networks and morphogenesis. I am fascinated by the patterns generated by positive feedback loops, particularly in natural dissipative systems, where large amounts of energy are flowing through the system. The most advanced models for understanding the manifestations in the natural world appear to be models of self-organization and emergent behavior. Within an infinite field of incomprehensible chaos, there arise transitory, continuously morphing, fractal formations of relative stability. These emerging patterns of relative stability within a complex dynamical scheme are analogous to the periodic windows within a simple dynamical scheme. The emergent patterns within complex systems are clearly reflected in the fractal manifestations of nature. In this context, it becomes obvious that what we call order is not distinct from chaos, but really it is the thin surface of a vast conscious ocean of pure chaos.